Babies in Medicine pt 1

I've had a number of people reach out to me because I'm a mom and also a doctor, both of which happened in the same phase of life for me, and wanting advice on "how we've made it work". So here I am... my attempt at explaining our perspective on balancing family life and the demands of a medical career.

I will note that this is simply how we've made it work and that no situation is exactly the same. 
We've been very blessed to have made it through this part of our life relatively easily and I hope this sheds some light to other women in similar shoes. 

Mark 
Our first little boy was born in September of 2014 which meant I was in the beginning of second year of medical school when he was born. I was therefore obviously pregnant for the end of first year and into the summer break between. One of the hardest parts for me being pregnant at this time was that we were in the thick of anatomy lab, and with the lovely preservatives that cadavers are in this meant I wore an obnoxious respirator every time I was in the lab. These fumes can be dangerous to pregnancies so I had to be safe from the very beginning. Which meant I started wearing and everyone knew of my pregnancy as soon as I found out I was pregnant. Talk about everyone in your business! When it came to second year, our school schedule was "system based" with a clinical medicine course weaved in throughout the year. When Mark was born I was just finishing my cardiology block and about to enter respiratory. He ended up being born a mere 3 days before the cardio final in fact.

For the immediate postpartum period, I ended up getting 4 weeks "off" and basically skipped the respiratory block material/put it on hold. While I was at home snuggling my new baby and drowning in new motherhood I worked on studying for the cardio final I mentioned above as well as one mid-term that happened while I was on leave. I officially became "responsible" for new material for the following block. Once I was responsible for keeping up again I did a mix of actually going in to school for required things and listening to lectures online at home when I could skip. I'd tote my pump with me for longer days and rush home to nurse on days that I could. I'd study with a sleeping baby on my chest or pass him off to my mother-in-law between nursing sessions when I was home cramming. As for the things I missed, I was 100% responsible for the material and making them up. Within the first month I re-scheduled the final and midterm I had missed and while not stellar, I got through them both. For the course I completely "skipped", I spent spring break and the last week of the semester studying for the two exams for respiratory respectively.

The rest of my courses went to be expected. I was able to keep up and continued with a mix of actually going in and studying from home. At the end of second year comes the first round of Board exams which meant I was studying as much as I could with a 8-9 month old at home. As a side note related to board exams, I was still pumping at the time of my tests and was worried how that would be accommodated. But national exam companies are required to allow you to pump and give you a private space to do such. For me I didn't want to use any additional time from my exam to make pumping a big deal so I just set up in a more secluded hallway and pumped right there sitting on the floor under a nursing cover. I had plenty of people give strange looks but couldn't have cared less! Ha!

And here's my thoughts on the outcome of having baby #1 in medical school... It was tough, there is no way of sugar coating that. But it really wasn't as horrible as you'd think looking at it from other eyes. Sure my grades were never in the honors category. I was likely more tired than my other classmates and less available as other new moms. Yes I had to spend my spring break learning about pneumonia and antibiotics etc etc instead of getting a true break. There were definitely times I cried because my baby preferred anyone but me. But by the time third year rolled around, I was completely caught up and had a new baby to show for it.

I should also add that we literally couldn't have done it on our own. From the very beginning we've had tremendous support from our families, not to mention J works from home every single day. My mom would spend a weekend with me if I had to study and J had other commitments. J's mom would come to our house during the week to watch Mark while I was at school/studying and J was working. We never had to worry about child care or daycare and always had someone available for babysitting.

And then we made the crazy decision to add our littlest to the bunch and got pregnant just as third year of medical school was starting. More on that piece of the puzzle to follow...