Baby H: Twelve Months of Mark

He...

[+] weighs 22#3oz (57%) and is 30in long (38%) with a head of 47cm (69%). I looked back on his stats over the past year and it's shocking how different they were in the beginning. We struggled so bad with nursing with him dipping to the 5th% for weight so needless to say I'm thrilled to be at this place now.

[+] is wearing 12-18mo clothes, size 4 diapers and size 4.5 shoes. He wears a size 4 overnight diaper through the night and none of his hats fit his noggin anymore.

[+] is just trucking along right now and the consistency of it feels great. He still sleeps 7:30-7:30 at night, takes two naps (95% of the time) and wears a sleep sac whenever he's in his crib. He eats basically everything we do which makes things so, so easy. He hasn't gotten any new teeth since last month and really isn't doing anything else new.

[+] The one thing that's different this month is the transition away from formula and towards whole milk. We've kept his morning and evening bottles the same giving him 6 & 7oz of formula, respectively. But during the day we've made the switch to milk. He definitely didn't take to it right away and we think it has to do with the temperature. Sure we could warm it up for him but that's not something we want to get in the habit of so we are just giving it to him cold. We kept his original "bottle feeds" after his naps just replacing what was inside and will start transitioning more towards emphasis on meals with a sippy of milk soon.

[+] celebrated his first birthday! On his actual birthday we went to Chick Fil A for free breakfast for birthday kids, cleaned the house for his party, ate pizza and vanilla ice cream for dinner and ended the night in his favorite place, the bathtub. We threw him an awesome first birthday party the following day and boy was this boy spoiled. So many of our best friends and all our family came to celebrate our boy and he happily wandered around in the yard and dominated his blue cake. It was a fantastic weekend with our one year old!

[+] nicknames: Marky, My Mark, Boo

[+] likes: shrimp, the dinosaur at the park, waving hi to strangers, being the center of attention

[+] dislikes: being put down for naps, sitting in his high-chair, being told "no"

I...

[+] am in disbelief that we have a one year old. Time is such a strange thing, isn't it? Sometimes I feel like I don't even remember being pregnant. Sometimes it feels as if Mark has always been here with us. Sometimes it seems impossible that 365 days have gone by since I was anxiously awaiting his arrival late that night. This year has contained every emotion, everywhere between the highest of highs and the lowest of lows and in the end, it's been magical. Motherhood is magical.

[+] spent the last month helping bring babies into the world and can I just say how amazing birth really is. There is nothing like that 2 seconds of in between worlds that babies go through, not quite born yet but making their appearance. One moment they didn't exist in this world and then the next they do! It's pretty dang neat.

Baby H: Eleven Months of Mark

He...

[+] weighs about 21 and a half pounds. He is a big boy that's for sure and with his wild-side, sitting on the baby scale has turned into a "throw myself off the top of the dresser" game so his at-home weights aren't nearly as accurate anymore.

[+] took his first unassisted steps on August 15th and while they were quite wobbly and only a few in sequence it was such an amazing moment. Since then he's gotten so much better about standing still without holding anything and his Bambi-legs are getting much better at walking. He can get across a room, around furniture and even across different surfaces. He seems so proud of himself and boy are we proud too.

[+] finally has all four of his top teeth with the second middle tooth popping through this month. It's definitely behind all the others so his grin is still extra goofy but I'm happy it's out even the slightest bit. And goodness gracious, can I say how much worse those two front teeth were than all the rest!? Yikes!

[+] hasn't said any more words this month but is communicating in other ways which is fantastic. He chatters all the time and will "talk" back and forth with you. He's also started to finally pick up some signing and will sign "more", "milk" and "all done" most of the time. His signs aren't exactly correct at this point but he does a motion that's very close each time we ask so I'll take it.

[+] is starting to really do interactive play with us and it's so much fun. He will come and find you if you hide behind a chair or a corner and always has the biggest grin when he sees you. He giggles and crawls faster than I've ever seen if you tell him "I'm gonna get you!". He bangs to blocks together to make noise, booty dances to a good rhythm, and puts toys in your hand if you ask "can I have it?"

[+] nicknames: Marky, Love-B, Boo, Little Bear, My Mark

[+] likes: throwing toys down the cat-door, Ollie, shrimp, his new play room

[+] dislikes: not getting his way, changing his diaper, sitting still, the Bert & Ernie book

I...

[+] have come to accept that there will be plenty of things I'll "miss out on" in the months and years to come given my chosen career. But the bright side of realizing this is that it makes the moments I do get to witness that much sweeter. Like Mark's walking mentioned above. I had tears of joy the moment he took those steps, half because he was doing so well and half because I witnessed it with my own eyes.

[+] am finishing my first clinical rotation of my third year this week. I jumped right into things and started with GYN surgery and it's been quite the adventure. I am thrilled to be out of the classroom and actually into the "real world" but that also means I can't skip class because I want to and often times have to be at work early in the morning. I've had so much OR experience and seen so many transforming surgeries. I've gotten a bit of office experience to help me with the ever-developing patient interaction aspect of medicine. I'm so happy to be using what the last two years have taught me but it's hard leaving for long days, being on the road before my baby wakes up, etc etc. I'm thankful I've been home every night in time to play for a while and put him to bed and I'm working on counting my blessings where I can.

Baby H: Ten Months of Mark

He...

[+] weighs 20#9oz according to our scale at home.

[+] is wearing 12 month sized clothes with a few 6-9mo thrown in (mostly t-shirts and shorts) and is in size 3 diapers during the day and size 4 overnight.

[+] has stood on just his feet without holding on a few times for only a few seconds at a time but seems so proud of himself when he does. He is all over the place all the time and it's actually quite hard to keep him contained if need be. He's always turning around in his highchair, he tries to stand in his stroller and usually won't let you hold him unless you're actively moving around and even then sometimes he tries to throw himself from your arms. He tasted freedom and won't go back.

[+] went on his first airplane ride and family vacation to Napa and did so, so well. I actually feel bad that we doubted him as much as we did. The flights weren't perfect and he had a few moments of terror while we were there but overall he was great.

[+] is no longer in his infant carrier carseat and I can't believe it! We knew we wanted to take the baby seat (and the stroller system) with us on our vacation so we didn't transition him until we got back but he seems so much happier in the bigger seat. We got a killer deal on a Graco My Ride 65 from Amazon on a random sale and then got a Graco Contender 65 as the second seat also from Amazon.

[+] said his first word on June 15th and momma lost! He's in dada, dada, dada mode! He really enunciates the word and moves his tongue in the silliest way. But now that the first words out of the way, I might just flip if his next word is Ollie! Ha!

[+] had his second lateral incisor pop through the gum on July 16th and then the left front tooth broke through the gum on July 25. We can tell they've really been bothering him lately so hopefully the end is in sight.

[+] got his first real cold this month and boy can I say how happy I am he's been so healthy till now. His nose has been a little fountain of snot and he screams bloody murder when it's super runny, we try to wipe it or use the nose frida to help him. I can't be sure if it's related but he also projectile vomited twice (once while out to lunch and once all over me) and I feel so horrible for him when that happens. He's also been refusing bottles and we're not sure what the cause of that is. Whether its from just feeling crummy and not being as hungry, because he's so congested and it's hard to breath or even because his gums are sore and sucking makes it worse we're still not quite back to normal with his feeds yet.

[+] went to the Denver Zoo for the first time and while he slept for about an hour right in the middle of the trip, still got to see lots of different things. He smiled at the zebras, giraffes and elephants and liked touching the glass on all the fish and reptile tanks.

[+] nicknames: Marky-Mark, Monk, Monkey,

[+] likes: turkey hot dogs, Ollie, swimming, pushing his cart

[+] dislikes: colds/booger removal, sun on his face in the car, diaper changes

I...

[+] have just started thinking about his first birthday party (holy crap where has my baby gone!?!). There isn't a "theme" because he doesn't "really like" any certain thing/character yet so we're going with a color-scheme of cherry red, bright blue and gray to celebrate our boy. Like all our invites recently (save the dates, wedding, gender reveal, baby shower) I have created his party invitation and as soon as I know a bit more about my schedule for around that time I'll be picking a date and time. I made a birthday banner to hopefully use for years to come while I had some free time last week. I'm hoping to make his smash cake and possibly coordinating cupcakes for the party. I'm envisioning snack foods/apps for guests with some sort of yummy cocktail. Now to just decide how big of a shin-dig we want this to be.

[+] have throughly been enjoying my time off from school with my boys. It's been so nice to read something for pleasure, put Mark down for his naps, binge watch Netflix, go on adventures in the middle of the day and just relax. There's nothing I have to do and no where I have to be and it's been fantastic. Granted I only have another week until the madness of rotations start but I'll be soaking up the last few days as much as possible. Oh and did I mention my first rotation is surgery? Nothing like jumping in head first.

[+] am getting myself a new gym membership today in hopes of making myself start going again. We previously had a 24 Hour membership and while J is going to continue to go there I'm switching to the rec center instead. It's cheaper but smaller but for me that's just fine.

Baby H: Nine Months of Mark

He... 

[+] weighs 20#0.5oz (56%) and is 27.5in long (15%) with a head of 46cm (77%). More moving on the growth curves which we're thrilled about. He's definitely a chunky guy now which is such a blessing after all our weight struggles in the beginning and hopefully his height starts shooting up soon too.

[+] got his top left lateral incisor on June 11 which is odd since the central ones usually pop out before these ones. I have a sneaking suspicion the middle ones aren't far behind because his gums are super swollen and he's been a hot mess lately.

[+] has a new schedule and while it's took a while to get in the groove, I think we made the right decision for him. He sleeps 7:30 to 7:30 during the night and takes two naps around 10 and 2 for anywhere between 1.5 and 2 hours each. With the weather warming up, more activities during the summer, a vacation on the horizon, we were feeling a little "stuck" with three naps at home in his crib. Going down to two means he's awake for longer between them giving us more time for adventures.

[+] now only gets four 7oz bottles (instead of five smaller ones) thanks to his nap schedule change but again, I think it's working perfectly. We've also upped his solid food intake to three meals a day and the time change of things has made his "meals" fall better with our normal breakfast, lunch and dinner. We're still working through some purees that are in the freezer but he's also eating a lot of regular food too. He really loves his broccoli + green apple puree, blueberries, tomatoes and avocado, greek yogurt and cottage cheese and basically anything we set in front of him. He's turning into such a good eater and is getting so good at feeding himself. He's also practicing drinking water with his sippy cup, out of a straw and from the edge of a cup.

[+] crawls like a madman and is getting quicker by the day. He is also a pro at pulling himself up and has successfully learned how to get down from standing without trouble. He got a push-cart walker toy that he loves to hold onto and walk behind, he "walks" along the edge of the couch and has officially learned to climb! The stairs are the perfect game in his mind (save us!). I don't think it'll be long before he's running at this rate.

[+] occasionally waves, gives high fives and squeaks and squawks all day long. He hasn't really made any distinct "sounds" yet like ma, ba, da, etc but we're really not worried about it. He'll also turn his head, crawl around, etc when you ask him "where's Ollie?" which is just so cute.

[+] nicknames: Marky-Mark, Boo, Love-B, Stink-stink (it seems like these few nicknames are sticking around)

[+] likes: popsicles, watermelon, being chased, water, Ollie

[+] dislikes: diaper/clothes changes, his car seat, getting teeth, being told "no"

I... 

[+] covet Mark's big, slobbery open mouth kisses like none other! He doesn't do it on demand yet but sometimes if I'm laying on the floor with him he speed-crawls over, grabs my face with his little fists and plants one on me. And the best part? He only does it with me! I'm sure J (and the grandmas) would appreciate the loving too but for now I'm soaking it all up. I've had so many moments of doubt that I'm not connecting with him enough, that I'm gone too much, that he doesn't do anything different with me than he does with someone else. So these silly kisses are exactly what his momma-heart needs.

[+] am 8 days out from being completely finished with boards and on summer break! It's been rough this last month or so and the time off, enjoying the summer, spending time with my boy, going on adventures and being stress free are going to be welcomed with open arms. And open bottles of wine most likely!

[+] sometimes get bummed that my life and my crazy medical school/residency journey is so difficult in terms of planning. Now that we have a family (and even before when it was just J and I) it's more difficult to take any opportunity that comes my way. Mark is so lucky to spend the first few years of his life in really close proximity to his grandmas and goodness knows we need their help a lot. And it just kills me that there's a chance, even if it's small, that we'll have to move farther away again and he won't have that for a while. Not to mention the planning and aspects of life related to baby number 2. (Nope, not pregnant, not trying, just being my A-type planner self).

Baby H: Eight Months of Mark

He...

[+] weighs 18# 9oz based on our scale at home. He is getting so big so quickly, I can't believe it.

[+] is wearing 6-9mo & 9mo size clothes and I have officially washed, folded and packed away all his clothes that no longer fit. Cue the tears! And also the shock that he really was that small at one point. I am impressed with myself (and everyone else in Mark's life) that we only have one storage bin for everything size Nb to 6mo. He's also in size 3 diapers and size 4 overnight diapers for nighttime. Now that he is such a belly sleeper there were a few mornings where his jammies were soaked in the morning along the front and the larger size seems to be stopping that.

[+] has his second bottom tooth and goodness are they sharp! He's gotten me a handful of times as well as biting himself a few times too. He's starting to learn how to use those bad boys for good eating. No signs of the top ones yet but we shall see.

[+] is moving and grooving all over the place and seems so much happier because of it (see below). He's tasted some freedom and isn't looking back! In a matter of a few days he went from struggling to really hauling and it's so much fun but way more work. Occasionally he'll pull himself up on something (toy bin, his play piano, our legs) and just figured out how to go from belly to sitting too. What a fun stage.

[+] still eats 6 times a day but this will most likely be changing sometime soon (see below for part of it) and I'm not sure how much longer his nap schedule will stay the same which will change his feeds too. He also eats solids twice or three times a day with a mixture of the purees I have left and baby-led-weaning feeding himself. He's getting really efficient and it's so fun to watch him pick and choose which items on his tray go in his mouth. He's also tried squeeze pouches as a trial for when we're out of town and so far so good.

[+] is really smiley when he's awake and it's so much fun. He loves playing peek-a-boo with a blanket or when you crawl around a corner and pop out at him. He's really ticklish especially when I nibble with my teeth on his upper arms, palms and feet. He lights up whenever Ollie walks by or pays attention to him and he'll usually flash a silly grin at female waitresses/baristas/check-out clerks etc when we're out. He also loves birthday songs when we're at restaurants which is adorable.

[+] nicknames: Marky, Stink-stink, Love-B, Boo, Buddy

[+] likes: mobility, door-stops, jumping off the couch, feeding himself

[+] dislikes: a stern "no", not getting his way, car rides

I... 

[+] am done breast feeding and pumping. After a few horrible nursing sessions (that happened to correspond with J being out of town) I decided to throw in the towel on his 8 month birthday for good. My original plan was to get him to 6 months on some BM every day, which got revised to "as long as possible" after my supply took another hit but we were still succeeding with our new plan. But those last few nights of tears from both of us and overwhelming frustration at myself and my boy on top of just plain inconvenience of pumping so often for not that much milk was when I decided to call it quits. Thankfully since then our nursing sessions have been back to normal. I'll still pump throughout the day and call that milk "bonus" but I won't be driven by a 3-hour schedule anymore and won't actually nurse him anymore which means a bottle in the morning and no more dream feed. I knew this day would come eventually but I'm much more at peace about it knowing that I'm choosing to end when I am as opposed to just quitting in the thick of it.

[+] have one more month until the dreaded Board exams which means things are going to get worse until they get better. I spent basically the month of May out of the house at prep classes during the day which was such a bummer to be gone from my boy so much. Thankfully the next month will mostly involve studying and practice questions at home but still lots of time "away" which I'm not looking forward to.

[+] am starting Whole30 on June 1st and plan on posting entirely about the motivation, process and journey as I go. I wanted to wait to do smoothing like this along with any type of exercise program until I was done breastfeeding and now I can't wait to start feeling more like myself again instead of just Mark's mom/food source.

Baby H: Seven Months of Mark

He... 

[+] weighs 17#5 according to our scale at home. He goes in for a booster shot in a few days and I'll update then.

[+] is basically wearing-out his 3-6 month size clothes and moving into 6-9 & 9 month sizes. More often than not the original item I pull from his drawer in the morning gets put on and then immediately taken off because it doesn't fit. Once his "current size" drawer is close to empty he'll officially make the transition. He's also in size 3 diapers and wears a size 2 shoe.

[+] got his first tooth on April 7th. Bottom left and I have a feeling it's pair is not too far behind. He wasn't super difficult while he was teething but we could definitely tell something was up. He was a bit more fussy when he was awake, was less interested in eating both bottles and solids and was waking a few times in the night to fuss. We're glad it popped through and his silly grin is even more cute now. We did get him a Baltic Amber necklace to wear to see if we can beat these teeth to the curb.

[+] is on the verge of mobility and it's so fun (and frustrating sometimes) to watch him try to learn. He's not quite to the "almost crawling stage" but he back scoots (aka pushes his big noggin across the carpet) and rolls in both directions towards something he wants. Sometimes he's really into it and ends up across the room, happily playing with the toy/edge of the couch/blanket/dog that he encounters. And sometimes he hates it and ends up moving quite a bit out of pure yelling and screaming and flailing.

[+] drinks from momma twice and four times from a bottle in a day. His bottles either have 5 or 6oz of either BM or formula in them. He also "eats" twice in a day and we've started introducing more and more table foods. I haven't made any more purees and most likely won't at this point since he's already doing so well feeding himself. We still stick to the "one new thing at a time for 3 days" rule but he also eats things his already had during those periods too. So far he's eaten apple and peach slices, whole bananas, baby puffs, pickles, pieces of bread, broccoli, baby carrots, peanut butter and scrambled eggs. We set him in the highchair, put food on his tray and let him have at it.

[+] sleeps 7:30pm to 7/7:30am thank the high heavens. Occasionally he'll wake up a bit earlier, say 6:30 ish, but we don't actually go get him until its wake-up time. Sometimes he'll happily coo in his crib playing with his lovey, sometimes not so much. He also takes three naps during the day for between 1-1.5hours each. I have a feeling the last nap of the day might be on it's way out sometime soon but we'll let him decide.

[+] has started saying "goo, gaa" and other G-sounds which is fantastic. Still working on the momma and dada though. He's also started screeching at the top of his lungs. Its so loud and not a habit we want to continue but aren't really sure what to do about it. Other than take him outside which makes him silent as a mouse, so strange.

[+] nicknames: Marky, Chunk-chunk, Buddy, Love-B, Mark-My-Son

[+] likes: dill pickles, being outside, Ollie, tummy sleeping

[+] dislikes: lotion on his cheek still, being left alone, when you take something away (that he shouldn't have i.e. trash, a fork, etc)

I... 

[+] have 5 (yes five!!!) more days of classroom time until I'm done! I cannot believe the time is here. Granted I won't actually be "stress free" and will more likely be even busier through the end of June thanks to board studying but if I've made it this far I know I can put in the time the next two months and kill it.

[+] still battle lots of guilt related to breastfeeding except it takes on different forms than in times before. We have a great routine set up with his feeding schedule and I have no qualms about that. I get that he needed something more than I was able to provide for him for whatever the reason. But recently I don't even get 5oz in a single day pumping 3-4 times (which used to be 10oz+ when I started being a pumper). I knew this was bound to happen as pumps aren't as efficient and bodies don't respond the same way but that doesn't make it easier sometimes. My goal was 6 months which we've already met but goodness gracious what I wouldn't give to be a milk machine like some moms.

[+] need to start taking better care of myself. I'm getting enough sleep which is wonderful but have been saying "I need to workout" for months and months. Not to mention that I don't exactly eat very well either. Not bad 100% of the time but definitely not great. Mommas matter too and I just need to do it.

Baby H: Six Months of Mark

He... 

[+] weighs 16#7oz (29%) and is 25.5in long (8%) with a head of 44cm (69%). Hello growth chart crossing and putting on the chunk! We have no idea why he's such a shortie because neither J or I (or our families) are exceptionally short but he is who he is. And that noggin of his, goodness gracious.

[+] still wearing 3-6 month or 6 month clothes depending on the brand but they're fading fast. I had to go out and buy a bunch of stuff in the next size because we basically didn't have anything for him to wear. Also still in size 2 diapers but we're literally just trying to use up what we have left before going up to size 3.

[+] got diagnosed with eczema on his poor little cheek and it's been a battle. We thought it was just dry and chapped from the cold weather and dry climate but he has a few other spots of it (chest, ankle, etc) that confirmed it was eczema. He was given a steroid cream prescription that cleared it up in no time but no matter how much moisturizer we put on it, it's slowly creeping back. Our pedi said it's likely he'll grow out of it by a year so we're keeping our fingers crossed and the ointments slathered.

[+] is ticklish on the backs of his thighs, on his ribs (especially the right side) and in his armpits which is the most recent find and the one that works no matter what. His baby belly laugh is pretty much the best sound ever.

[+] still has the same nursing/bottle schedule as last month but is also doing so good in the solid food realm. So far he's had bananas, sweet potato, carrots + nutmeg, peaches + cloves, peas + nutmeg, butternut squash + thyme, apples, green beans + parsley and blueberries + cinnamon. I wrote a whole post about his foods because I've been making them all from scratch and it's been so fun seeing him try new things. He hasn't loved them all but he loves eating regardless.

[+] rolls front to back and back to front, sits on the floor to play with toys (with only a few backwards topples every now and then), sits in a highchair when we go out to eat, puts his toes in this mouth, rides in the stroller without his carseat, sits in a cart at the grocery store and chats up a storm. He's meeting lots of milestones and is more fun each and every day. I think I've said this before but I always thought I'd love the newborn stage but this is so much better!

[+] has no signs of teeth that I can pin-point just yet but I think they're on the move. He's been drooling like mad for months, basically anything we hand him goes right to his mouth and his cheeks are always rosy thanks to dry skin/eczema. But that's the problem with "teething symptoms", they're so non-specific that they basically mean nothing. Someday he'll get this teeth and for now we're enjoying his gummy grin.

[+] nicknames: Marky, Boo and new to the list Hootie

[+] likes: Ollie dog, walks in the stroller, blueberries and apples, baths/water

[+] dislikes: diaper changes, lotion on his face, carrots and avocados

I...

[+] am almost in a state of shock that my baby is half-way through his first year! And that we're all surviving and better yet striving is icing on the cake. It really is true that the days are long but the years are short.

[+] absolutely love seeing J as Mark's dad. He's engaged and silly and tries his hardest to be the best for our sweet boy and it warms my heart. I know there are a lot of dad's who are gone a lot or who are disconnected from their kiddos for one reason or another but that is farthest from the truth for my little family. Not that I had any doubt that this would be the case it's just so comforting seeing it come to fruition.

[+] have only 6 more weeks until my "classroom time" in medical school is finally over! And I cannot believe that it's quickly approaching like that. Years 3 and 4 will be spent in the clinic/hospital setting and just one more step to being done. These last almost two years have been hard, lots of work, lots of stress, lots of late nights, lots of leaving my baby, lots of less family time than I'd like but the fact that I'm doing it all... momma, wife, student... I'm pretty dang lucky is all I have to say.

Happy half birthday my sweet boy. You are such a dream and I can't believed I lived without you for so long. Life with you is so much grander, so much fuller, so much better and each day we spend with you tops the one before. You have taught your daddy and I so much already about how to be the perfect parents for you and we are so lucky to have you in our family. Life is a great adventure with you and we can't wait for the ride to continue. My heart grew in size the day you were born, the love I have for you is indescribable. 

xoxo, your momma

Baby H: Five Months of Mark

He... 

[+] weighs about 15lbs and is packing on the rolls!

[+] is in size 2 diapers and 3-6/6month size clothing but I have a sneaking suspicion we won't be in these sizes much longer.

[+] can officially roll front-to-back and it's now even more impossible to get tummy time in. Before he used to just wail any time we'd set him on his belly but now he fusses for a second and then flips himself over in no time. How this little boy is ever going to learn to crawl is beyond me since he refuses to stay on his belly now for any amount of time. But either way, yay rolling!

[+] had his first bites of real food and it was a huge success. We started with mashed up ripe banana mixed with breast milk. He didn't exactly know what to do with it in his mouth at first but after a few spoonfuls was opening wide and smiling having a grand old time. We started with just once a day and then moved to twice and he gobbles up what we give him. He's also tried sweet potatoes and there are carrots in the freezer and oatmeal in the pantry ready to try soon. Since I'm making it all myself I'm not positive how much he takes each time but I'd estimate about an ounce/half a normal baby food container. And he'd probably take more but that's just all we offer him at one time. What a fun adventure!

[+] nurses from me when he first wakes up, takes four 5oz bottles throughout the day and then gets a dream feed from me before J and I head to bed. I think the consistency of his feeds in the day is making a huge difference in his mood, his weight and his sleeping.

[+] is finally sleeping through the night again (knock on wood). We changed his schedule up a bit during the day as far as when he eats and sleeps and now that he's getting more ounces in the day-time he dropped the night feed all on his own. He goes to bed at 7:30, I dream feed him between 10:15/10:45 and he sleeps until at least 7 the next morning. Occasionally he'll wake in the middle of the night but usually just fusses/cries for a few minutes and puts himself back to sleep. We're all very, very happy about this!

[+] is accomplishing so many firsts on top of what I've already mentioned. He went on his first walk sans-carseat and loved sitting in the stroller like a big boy to watch as we walked. He sat in a high chair when J and I went to dinner and while it didn't last the whole meal it was definitely progress. He's been practicing sitting up and playing in his bouncer all by himself. And I'm not the least bit sad that he's growing up.

[+] nicknames are Marky, Boo and Love-B

[+] likes: mommy's milk from a bottle, dancing and music, his Gram & Grammy

[+] dislikes: burping, lotion on his chapped cheek, the wind in his face

I...

[+] have so much less stress and anxiety related to breastfeeding and our sweet boy's growth and it has done wonders to my sanity. I'm planning a whole post specifically on our breastfeeding adventures (enthralling I know) but the short story is that he's been getting more formula while also getting breast milk too and he's growing like a weed and has a much happier momma. I still have a lot of guilt but it is much easier to handle knowing he's doing so well.

[+] miss being pregnant already. Ha! Thankfully I had a really easy pregnancy with Mark and while the end was uncomfortable, I'd do it again in a heartbeat. I loved being responsible for growing someone who was half me and half J, what an incredible honor.

[+] am officially back to my pre-pregnancy weight. And without setting foot inside a gym, eating plenty of chocolate cake and basically just being a milk machine. I've always been blessed to not deal with weight issues but being back to that "starting line" sure does feel good regardless. My body is different now, without a doubt, but I've actually surprised myself with how accepting of it I am. I grew a human for crying out loud! The softness in my body is the last lingering sign of that accomplishment.

Baby H: Four Months of Mark

He...

[+] weighs 13lbs (5%) and is 24in long (7%) with a head of 42cm (60%). We've been worried about his weight recently but the pedi seemed comfortable where he's at especially since he's proportional weight to height. And he's still rockin' the big ol noggin.

[+] puts everything in his mouth! Toys, his fingers or entire fist, blankets, bibs, our fingers, etc etc. He is so slobbery and usually has a soaked shirt to prove it. Sometimes when he wakes up from naps his A&A blanket is soaked from where he's been fighting his swaddle and sucking the blanket.

[+] is on the brink of so many milestones and we are waiting on pins and needles for them to happen. If we strategically place his arms correctly, he'll roll from tummy to back. He will sort of sit up without help until his big noggin topples him over. His giggles are showing up more and more and boy does this little boy love to smile!

[+] is starting to transition out of the swaddle and so far so good. We've started with naps, just like how we transitioned into the crib, and we've got about a week under our belts. We knew we couldn't go cold-turkey with it because he still has wild arms and smacks himself in the face. So from a suggestion on a mommy-board I took a long sleeve sleep sac and tied the arm holes shut. That way he can move and bend his arms without going crazy. The transition has shown that we might have a side sleeper on our hands which is awesome for his silly bald spot.

[+] loves when we read books before bed. His bedtime routine involves either a bath or all-over lotion, putting on jammies and sitting on my lap for a book. Just recently he's started really looking at the books and the pictures as I turn the pages. Before he used to just sit there while I read but now he'll follow the book if I move it and I can't wait for him to really understand story-time.

[+] no longer sleeps through the night but as is life with a baby, right? As soon as you have something established, it goes out the window. I'm pretty sure it has to do with hunger rather than habit which means there's nothing we can do about it at this point except feed him. Good nights he wakes up once (usually between 2-4am) and bad nights he wakes up three times but only eats once. Hello possible four month sleep regression?

[+] went swimming for the first time on Saturday and absolutely loved it. He was such a fish already and I'm so glad we took him. I'll be doing a whole post on this soon but our 30min dip has me so excited for the summer and days spent splashing around in the sun.

[+] nicknames are Marky, Love-B and Buddy (from mommy and daddy), Boo and Buckwheat (from grammy).

[+] likes: his swing, daddy's songs, his leap-frog singing dog

[+] dislikes: wearing pants, being sleepy, sitting still, dad's car

I...

[+] cannot believe I've been this little boy's momma for 4 months already. Seriously where is the time going? As much as I miss his new baby smell and him sleeping on my chest in those early days I have to admit that I love this stage and the passage of time. Mark was really high needs in the beginning so as each day passes life with him gets easier and much more fun. I always thought I'd love being a "newborn momma" but it turns out this stage is even better.

[+] received a great compliment from our Education Specialist at school that made me feel so much better about being a Doctor-mommy combo. It would be impossible for me to choose which part of my life is more important to me because they're on totally different playing fields. I've worked so hard to get where I am education/carrier wise but being a momma has always been a dream too. Often I feel like I am failing at both so it was great to hear from someone else that I can be successful at both.

[+] bought a new swimsuit that I like to call my "sport suit" instead of my mom suit. It's C9 by Champion from Target, has regular bikini bottoms and a really cute, sporty tankini top. When we decided to go swimming I knew there was no way I wanted to dawn a bikini already thanks to not stepping in the gym for over 6mo so I figured this was the best way to go. Plus lugging a baby around makes it more difficult to make sure everything is in place so I'm very happy with my purchase.

Baby H: Three Months of Mark

 He... 

[+] weighs 12lbs according to our scale at home but we won't get an accurate weight or length measurement until his 4 month well-baby check-up in another month.

[+] turned 3 months old on Christmas day and celebrated his first holiday season with lots of family and lots of love. He has all these new toys to play with and could care less about any of them right now. Babies!

[+] is 100% sleeping in his crib and the transition went really well. We started with naps during the day to get him used to it and then decided one night to just not pull out the rock n' play. He sleeps along the short end of the crib (perpendicular to how you'd normally sleep in a bed) as I heard they like being near the walls so it doesn't feel so open. We also have a bath towel rolled up into a "U" under the fitted crib sheet that we set him in so when he turns a bit he doesn't feel so "free". Eventually we'll move him more and more to the center and remove the towel, along with someday removing his swaddle but for now I'm just happy with our progress.

[+] has giggled a handful of times, very briefly each time, and they are the sweetest sounds ever. I thought I loved his chatter once he found his voice but the giggles are so much better. The best ones have come from tickling his hips after a diaper change so now I tickle him after each one.

[+] has recently been sleeping from 8pm to 7/7:30am with a dream feed at 10pm when mom and dad go to bed. We are loving the extra sleep! He is still fussing a little bit around 6/6:30am but will usually go back to sleep as soon as we give him the paci and rock him a little. Today though he didn't make a peep until 7:15!

[+] is still a bit of a handful when it comes to feeds but from looking back on how it used to be, things are so much better in this department. He latches great and usually feeds well. The only thing that's still an issue is sometimes he's just not happy when he feeds. I think it might be gas related but sometimes he'll get so upset mid-feed that it's hard to calm him enough to help him get the gas out. I've also stopped being so worried about him getting enough since he is is clearly growing, is happy, and has a few rolls coming in which definitely takes so much stress off my shoulders.

[+] nicknames are Marky Mark, Buddy, Lovie, and Baby Boy

[+] likes: laying under the Christmas tree, sucking on his fingers, playing airplane and singing songs

[+] dislikes: tummy time... still, car rides (just recently and we're not enjoying this) and the nose sucker

 I... 

[+] still have moments where I feel like I'm failing at everything. Moments where school is taking up all my time and yet I'm not doing as well as I'd like to be all while sacrificing spending time with my sweet little boy. And I'm going to be honest and say that it's hard. It's hard to see your baby in 15 minute increments throughout the day just to be his food source. It's hard to put in so much work and not have your efforts be enough. But no one every said motherhood was easy all the time.

[+] have been on winter break for a week now and am loving being able to spend time with my little family. Every once in a while I wish there was another set of hands here to pass off the babe to when I need to use the restroom or want to paint my nails but then I get to snuggle my baby, take a bath with him and put him to bed every night and my heart grows in size.

[+] am starting to realize that everything I imagined motherhood being was so wrong. Motherhood is so much harder than I ever thought it would be. It's more tiring, more demanding, more frustrating. Sometimes I wonder how someone so small can require so much patience and have constant needs. But then there are moments of motherhood that are so much better than I ever imagined they could be. Seeing your husband play with your son, feeling little breath on my neck as my baby snoozes on my chest, those moments feel so much incredible that I ever imagined. I never thought a millisecond giggle would bring me to tears of joy. There's really no way to prepare to be a momma but it's one of the best titles I've ever had.

Baby H: Two Months of Mark

He...

[+] weighs 11lbs (18%) and is 22in (9%) long with a whopping 39.25cm head (70%). We think his arms and his legs seem so long all the time but apparently he's a shorty still. And we're keeping our fingers crossed that massive head of his means he'll have lots of brain power!

[+] smiles and coos and chats up a storm and it is seriously the best thing ever! His little personality is so fun.

[+] had a pretty decent rash going on for about a week which prompted a visit to the pediatrician. It seemed like hives but it progressively spread from his chest/stomach to his neck and arms and coincided with some changes in feeding habits which is why we felt the need to go in. Thankfully it was nothing, most likely a contact dermatitis, that we aren't sure the cause of but it seems to be getting better and we're watching what we put on him from here on out.

[+] realizes he has hands which means he's started putting his fists in his mouth and rubbing his eyes when he's tired. He has a seriously strong grip which means anything is fair game at this point. Most commonly grabbed items include my hair when it's down, my shirt when he's nursing and his paci right out of his mouth.

[+] has outgrown basically everything newborn size. We've transitioned to size 1 diapers and everything in newborn size clothes is too short except onesies. We might have a skinny green bean on our hands.

[+] is back to sleeping in his room for the last week after we moved him back into our room for a few weeks. We were told by a lactation consultant that sleeping in the same room on a different sleep surface for the first few months reduced the risk of SIDS and when someone tells you something like that you can't exactly ignore it. However this little boy makes so much noise in the middle of the night that one evening we just never moved his rock n' play into our room after his last nap and we haven't looked back.

[+] is a very hungry little boy and hates when he's fed on "slow speed". Nursing is that much more complicated because I have to quench is thirst quickly and then allow him to take his time which means switching back and forth between sides multiple times until he's satisfied. Whatever it takes though is fine with me.

[+] impressed the doctor with his head control while sitting and his standing skills. She said he has three-month level control of that massive noggin of his and that he stands better than a four month old she saw earlier in the day. Now just to work on that dang tummy time because he still hates that.

[+] nicknames are still Marky and Monkey with Baby Boy and Buddy thrown in too.

[+] likes: his paci, baths, bearing weight on his feet, the sound of the fan and dancing with mom.

[+] dislikes: being too hot, tummy time (but it is getting better), napping in his crib and putting on lotion.

I... 

[+] am starting to figure out the balancing act that comes with being a full time student while also being Mark's momma. It's complicated and I'm tired a lot. There's also a lot of guilt that comes with leaving him to go to class or spend time upstairs studying when I'd rather be loving on my sweet boy but I always know he's in the best hands and am thankful I can conquer my own dreams at the same time.

[+] am wearing all my old clothes now but some of them sure do fit differently now post-baby. Bottoms are all totally fine but tops are actually the challenge now. Thanks to new nursing boobs and a bit of a lower belly pouch still I've been sticking to a handful of shirts that don't make me feel blah. Good thing Christmas is coming up because this momma could use a few new wardrobe pieces.

[+] cannot wait for the holidays this year, even more so than other years, thanks to this little boy being in our life. He has no idea what's happening and what holidays even mean this year but I can't wait to celebrate with my new little family and start some traditions to carry on through his life.

[+] went my entire pregnancy without finding a single stretch mark only to find a single one post-baby after things have started going back into place. Thanks to my lovely decision at age 18 to get my belly button pierced I am now bearing a super odd looking stretch mark/scar/old piercing in the place of a piece of jewelry. Even though I took out the ring years ago, my teenage decisions are still haunting me. Ha!

Baby H: One Month of Mark

He...

[+] weighs 9#1 according to our most recent doctors appointment which is much better than our super accurate home measuring skills. J has a food scale that we place a wooden cutting board on and then top with our baby. Ha! His birth weight was 7#3, two day was 6#10 and two week was 7#6 so we're definitely on the upward trend and embracing the chunk.

[+] is just starting to flash us gummy grins every once in a while and I absolutely adore them. Granted it's usually because he's either milk-drunk or making a mess in his diaper but regardless, swoon! He's also just starting to find his voice and we'll get an occasional "coo" when we least expect it.

[+] consistently eats every 2-3 hours and takes between 4-5 ounces each time. Our pedi told us to wake him during the day to make sure he's getting enough but then allow him to sleep as long as he'd like at night. Unfortunately for us he sticks pretty close to that time frame even during the night. We got a few nights around week 2 where we got a 6 hour stretch (!!!) and now we're usually getting a 4 hour stretch but dang, we're all a bit tired.

[+] thankfully takes a bottle really well. He had his first one in the hospital due to some low blood sugars that required supplementing and we've been continuing to use them ever since with no nipple confusion or any of that other nonsense that people worry about. We use Medela and Tommy Tippee bottles and he takes to both equally. He switches between getting breast milk and Similac for Supplementing formula and eats like a champ with both.

[+] sleeps in his rock n play most of the time. We try and put him down in it in his room during the day for naps but sometimes he ends up sleeping elsewhere which for now is alright as long as it's not every time. We moved him out of our room during the night around 3.5 weeks because it seemed like everyone was waking everyone else up during our short stretches of sleep. Between Mark's grunting and little noises, normal noise when we shift positions in bed, the dog finding a new place to sleep there was a lot of waking up going on. Thankfully the transition went well and some day we'll start attempting putting him in his crib.

[+] attended his first wedding with mom and dad, has been to numerous football parties and helped some of our good friends find out their little one will be another boy to add to the clan. He can't wait to have another friend this spring.

[+] is still wearing all newborn sized clothes but I think we're going to start retiring them fairly soon. He has long limbs and feet that I think might outgrow outfits faster than his weight will dictate. He's also still in newborn size diapers and we've found to prefer Huggies and Up & Up brands.

[+] still fusses quite a bit on occasion especially when being put down or in the last few hours before bed (see pictures below!). He is definitely a high-needs baby and requires more from us than other little ones his age but we're taking it day by day and learning what he likes and doesn't like. Some days are better than others but as is life in parenthood I suppose.

[+] has nicknames Marky, Monkey, Nuggie and Chunk-Chunk.

[+] likes: being upright (hello gassy baby!), baths, car and stroller rides, staring into space or at lights, Irish Lullaby, daddy's chair-lift hold

[+] dislikes: changing clothes, being even a teensy bit hungry, initially being swaddled (but then loves it once he's bundled), tummy time, gas and belly aches

I...

[+] absolutely positively love this baby boy. Sure those first few days at home were some of the worst with Mark being inconsolable most of the time, screaming his head off and not knowing what to do to make him sleep but as the days and weeks pass by it's getting so much better. I've loved him since the moment I laid eyes on him but each day my love for him grows.

[+] am still battling with breastfeeding. In fact there are some days (and certain feeds) where I straight up hate it. Yep, I said it. I hate breastfeeding. It seems like we've been dealing with one thing after another and I can't catch a break. First it was not having milk while also having a super hungry baby who hated me for not filling his belly. Then it was a super badly cracked nipple on one side that required 72 hours off nursing and exclusively pumping to jumpstart the healing process which only partly did the trick. Now it's possible thrush with toe curling pain when he latches on initially and shooting/needle like pain between feeds that often keeps me awake at night. Add in a baby that sometimes fights feeds by pulling, turning his head, flailing all his limbs, and screaming when I try to fix his latch and I'm often in tears while feeding him. I hear that it gets better around 6 weeks and I have a doctors appointment to hopefully cure the infection so I'm not giving in yet but dang, something needs to change soon because I don't think I have it in me much longer.

[+] am down 22 lbs from my highest pregnancy weight which was a total gain of around 36 lbs. I still have 14-ish more to lose but at this point I'm not thinking about it any more than this. I know with breastfeeding the weight will come off a bit easier and to be honest, getting back to the gym is #500 on my list of priorities right now. Having a one month old while being in med school with a husband who works full time doesn't leave much time or energy to get workouts in and honestly, I'm okay with that. Sure I'm extra soft in the middle and would love to have a 6-pack immediately but hey, that's the benefit of having a September baby. Bring on the sweaters and scarves and comfy clothes for winter, I have 8+ months until summer time.

[+] wish more of my regular clothes fit, regardless of what I just said above. My mom did gift me a pair of Gap jeans in a size bigger than what I usually wear just so I could feel somewhat normal and wouldn't have to wear my maternity pants but I am longing for a bigger wardrobe sometime soon. All my tops fit great and I'm pretty close to getting into my old jeans so I know only time will help and I'll be there soon.

[+] start back at school officially this week which should be yet another adjustment period. Thankfully I was able to pretty much take the entire month off minus a few items and I'll still have to make-up more things before the end of the year but I'm very glad I've been able to be home during this time. To say I'm not a bit stressed about the workload while also being a mommy would be a lie but I know it'll all work out in the end and it makes me that much more thankful for all the help we have.

Mark baby, we are so thankful for you and the way you've changed our life in the last month. I still can't believe you're here and out of my belly some days but then other days I can't remember life without you. You are cranky and fussy and sometimes very hard to deal with but then you instantly calm when we pick you up, give us a big grin or sleep peacefully in our arms and we just can't believe how much we love you. You've taught me so much already about being your mommy and while we're far from having everything figured out I hope you know I'm always trying my best and will be here for you no matter what. I love you sweet boy, thank you for making me a momma.