Mark says what?!

-- J said "eat one more bite of dinner and you can have whatever you want." Mark's response... "I want wine."

-- "I'm sick and tired of you screaming Pat." Quickly followed by "sometimes Pat is difficult."

-- "You need to hurry up and get my ice cream before it turns 8 o'clock and it's my bedtime, mom."

-- While listening to Mulan's song Reflection "She said 'don't know' because she doesn't know things."

-- With the shower on in the bathtub, "it's raining. There is a floooooood!"

-- I poured myself a glass of wine and he said "fill it up to the top mom". To which I responded that I couldn't because it was a wine glass. He said "if you fill it all the way up you will go to bed very early." Whoops!

-- "I want to find a restaurant for dogs to come. It will say yes to dogs and kids."

-- "These are the crunchiest chips I ever did see!!!"

-- Mark: "Why's he eating yogurt?" Mom: "Because it's delicious." Mark: "no it's awful."

Mark Turns Two

Somehow our boy is TWO years old already! 

He... 

[+] weighs 29lbs (59%) and is 34.5in tall (52%). We are thrilled that he's caught up in height since he was such a shorty for so long and now there are days where he seems exceptionally long and lanky. He's really starting to lose his "baby body" and is more and more like a kid every day.

[+] wears all things 2T except for pajamas which he's in 3T for. He's still in size 4 diapers and his current shoes are size 7 but they're quickly getting too small.

[+] has sort of been working on using the potty but we aren't pushing it. We ask him if he wants to go throughout the day and sometimes he says yes and sometimes no. He's really good about peeing when we set him on it and gets two gummy bears when he does. He knows when he's going poop but always says no when we tell him to sit on the potty during that time. Sometimes we'll take his poopy diaper to the toilet and put the poop in so he can see where it's "supposed" to go but I don't really think he's getting it yet. They say boys are harder to potty train, he's just over two and we've got Pat to change still anyways so we're in no hurry.

[+] is going to eat us out of house and home in no time flat! This kid can seriously put some food down. He'll eat... An entire turkey sandwich on regular size bread. A six count nugget meal from Chick Fil A. Two hotdogs and a massive serving of fruit. The whole portion of mac n cheese with yogurt kids meal from Panera. And then there are times where we fight for him to take a single bite which proves toddlers really do rule the world.

[+] has started singing songs both with us and on his own and hearing his little voice just melts my heart every single time. The songs on his list right now include... I Love You (from Barney), Humble & Kind, Ba Ba Black Sheep, You Are My Sunshine, Hi-Ho, Happy Birthday, ABC's.

[+] is still adjusting to his big brother roll but I think this is more a product of his age than his intent. Sometimes he can be so sweet to Pat - trying to make him laugh, telling him "night Pat Pat, goodnight" when he goes upstairs to nap, giving him toys and constantly talking to him. But then other times he still hits with intent, throws or steals toys, tries to knock him over or pull him off of furniture. We've implemented time-out (for these things as well as others) and try to really praise him when he's good. I know that as they get older they'll be the best of friends and we try to remember the moments of sweet instead of the bad.

[+] is just starting to be interested in watching TV/movies which I'm pretty proud of us for delaying it this long. And for now, it's still quite a treat for him when we do say yes. His top shows are Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and Bubble Guppies and his favorite movies are Tarzan and The Lion King. Plus like any self-absorbed toddler, he loves watching videos of himself too.

 [+] got a strider bike for his birthday and we are so impressed with how quick he's learning to ride it. He started off really unsteady basically just walking with it between his legs. Now though he'll easily pick up some speed and "strides" a few steps before slowing himself down. We're happy the weathers been so nice here this fall and hope he can get some more practice before winter sets in.

[+] is giving us a little bit of worry on a medically-related issue after his two year well child check. I'm not quite sure I want to go into details about it, at least not yet, but it's requiring some imaging and visits to a peds specialist. We already know that one way or another our boy is going to be just fine, we're just hoping it's an easy process instead of a more complicated one.

[+] is still sleeping in his crib and I'm not sure when we're going to make any change to that. His sleep is so great right now that we almost don't want to rock the boat if we don't have to. He wears a sleep sac over his jammies and has never once tried to get out so it's not like we're pressed for change because of safety. We recently got him standard size pillow to sleep with and it's adorable to see him sleeping like a big kid on the video monitor. He also sleeps with his blue knit blanket, his lovie minky blanket, a bunny and his ducky.

[+] goes to bed around 8pm and wakes up between 7-7:30am although occasionally he sleeps till closer to 8am but not often. He still naps once around 1pm with his short naps being 1hr 15min and the long ones approaching 2.5hrs.

[+] is such a helper sometimes and it's so sweet to see this side of him. If we're playing outside he often finds a broom to help sweep up even if that means grabbing a handful of dirt from the pot to artificially make a mess. He also helps vacuum, dust and "mop" (aka swiffer) inside with Nani. Most days he feeds Ollie both times by getting his bowl out and dumping the scoop of food. Most of the time he'll help us get whatever item we ask for (his shoes, a paci for Pat, a piece of trash, etc). When I'm home in the mornings he also helps me make a cup of coffee in the Keurig. He knows I need one packet of sugar and then he opens the drawer, picks a k-cup, puts it in the holder and shuts it and then presses the correct button to make it brew.

[+] loves all things cars/trucks/buses and plays by driving them around on his road almost daily. He has a number of stuffed animals he loves including Simba, Elmo, Baby Bear, Billy and Clifford and he'll often feed them, put diapers on them and carry one around for a whole day. He's obsessed with his puffs (aka craft store pom poms) and in the most random of places we'll realize he has one clutched in his fist after hours. He sometimes likes to color with crayons and paint with both water colors and washable paints.

Things Mark Says... 
- "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, TRASH MAN COMING!!!!" - While yelling at the top of his lungs.
- If we talk about him growing - "grow stronger and smarter."
- While sitting at the table for dinner - "Daddy chewing. Mommy chewing. Pat Pat chewing. Marky chewing. EVERYBODY chewing."
- When we ask him what mommy does for work - "Doctor!". What daddy does for work - "Softball!"

- "Daddy loves money. Mommy loves daddy's money" - Yeah, really! 

- He sneezed twice so I told him bless you - "two bless yous momma."
- We made him some chicken nuggets in the microwave - "Jeepers, creepers! That's hot!"
- I was handing him pancakes as we were driving to the doctor's office - "Thank you mommy's hand!"
- When he burps or toots - "Excuse you, Daniel Boon."
- While reaching for one of us to pick him up - "Come here, mommy/daddy/etc, come here."
- He's recently started saying "where it is!!" (aka there) with so much enthusiasm when we're looking for something. 

Mother's Day 2016

Being a momma to these two boys has been one of the best things in my life and it was such a celebration to be with all three of my boys on Mother's Day this year, celebrating the joy of our family. 

We started early with a day trip to the Denver Zoo on Thursday afternoon. The weather was supposed to be crummy on actual Mother's Day so we decided to go early when the forecast was better. And boy was that a good decision. The weather was perfect, 80* with a touch of cloudy to keep the sun slightly at bay, and since it was during the week there was basically no one there. We laughed that Mark wanted to hold all the animals, got to see the baby gorilla without having to fight a hundred people at the glass, enjoyed a few beers (daddy) and a twist ice cream cone (momma & Mark) and toted around our super chill three-week old who only fussed the tiniest bit when it was time to eat. We left the zoo and headed to a near-by park so I could nurse the baby and Mark could run on a playground before getting in the car and heading home a bit sun kissed and absolutely exhausted but oh so happy.

On actual Mother's Day we spent the morning at home enjoying a venti Starbucks picked up by the two biggest boys before I even got out of bed. J and the boys gifted me my coordinating ring with Patrick's birthstone to go with my wedding set and Mark's sapphire band. After Mark's nap we decided to hit the aquarium for the afternoon. The weather was a bit crummy like we anticipated and even though there were tons of people who had the same idea as we did, it was still a great afternoon. Mark loved running up to the glass to see the fish, called all the sharks "daddy" from one of his favorite songs and wanted to go in all the tanks with open tops. And just like we expected, our Patrick went along for the ride without a fuss proving he's just meant to be in our family!

While this year I didn't get out to the spa, still smelt like old milk and had to calm many a toddler tantrum it was the perfect celebration. Motherhood to two-under-two isn't easy or glamorous but this is exactly where I'm meant to be right now and I couldn't dream of anything else. Mother's day was technically for me but it was because of my boys and that's what truly matters. 

To Mark, my first born and the one who made me a momma. To Patrick, my baby and the one who grew my heart double the size. I'm forever grateful to have you as my sons, to get to hear the word momma from your tiny lips, to know what it's like to be willing to give everything for someone else. I'm a lucky lady getting to be your momma and I cherish it every single day.

Baby H: 17 & 18 Months of Mark

One and a half years with our first born! I can't believe it! Time sure is flying these days between Mark growing and changing and learning new things on a daily basis as the weeks count down to adding our new boy to the mix. It just doesn't seem possible that he's been here, in our family, for so long already. This is probably my favorite age so far!

[+] is a short chunky guy with a big noggin according to the growth charts from the doctors office. From his 15 month appointment which ended up being 6 weeks late, oops, he was 30 inches (16th%) for height and 25#2oz (61st%) for weight. We still have no idea why he's such a shortie especially because he's got what seems to be long legs and big feet so it'll be interesting to see how this all shakes out as he grows.

[+] wears size 18 month clothes, 2T pajamas (not sure why they seem to run so small) and size 6 or 7 shoes depending on the brand/style. He is still rocking size 4 diapers and I have no idea when to even try size 5s for him. It seems like there's a huge weight overlap between these two sizes (more so than between other sizes) so for now we're sticking with 4s as he's not leaking/exploding minus the few times at night where his diaper is just filled to the brim.

[+] still has 12 teeth and I have no idea what's happening with his next set. Some days we're convinced they're making a move because he's cranky as all get out, chewing non-stop on anything (including his fingers which drives me bonkers!) and even sometimes running a low-grade temp but those teeth have yet to show themselves so who knows.

[+] knows the "sounds" of so many different things now. On the list (which weren't here before) is cat/kitty, duck, moose, fish, tiger/bear/lion (they all say the same thing). He also says waaaaa for "what a baby says" and shhhh (with his finger to his lips) for "what a mommy says" as well as honk and/or beep for cars/trucks.

[+] knows so many of his body parts which makes this future-doctor momma so happy. He knows, from head-to-toe... hair, head, ears, eyes, cheek, mouth, tongue. Arm, hand, fingers. Tummy, heart (which is by far one of my favorites!), butt, diaper, weenie. Leg, knee, feet and toes. He will point to all of his own body parts as well as momma/daddy/stuffed animals' and will also name them if you say "what's this" and touch his ___. In related news, he also knows what owies/hurts are thanks to a few scrapes/smashed fingers and will point to them if you ask him.

[+] got his second haircut on March 19th because it was getting a bit out of control. We randomly decided to stop by the shop on our way home from breakfast one Sunday and goodness does it make a huge difference in him looking like a baby vs a kid. He cried big fat tears at the beginning because she started with the clippers for the back which I think he was scared of but once she pulled out the scissors instead he was perfectly content. Maybe he'll just be old-fashioned and have to have scissors and single blade razors like a gentleman?

[+] loves when we sing to him but is very particular about what song it is. J often asks "do you want me to sing, Mark?" and he'll shout yeah! which is just adorable. But then if its a song he doesn't like/know he says, "no, no" while you're singing until you stop and switch to something else. His favorites, by far, are The Wheels on the Bus, Happy Birthday and Old McDonald.

[+] is starting to understand things related to his new baby brother. He realizes baby brother is in my tummy, will lift my shirt to "see" him, pushes my belly button in and tries to put his paci or juice cup in my belly button to share with him. He will hug and kiss my belly if I ask him to. He realizes baby brother has a crib in his room too, is obsessed with climbing in it to jump and play with his duck and says his version of "brother"/his first name when we mention baby brother. I don't think he has ANY clue what a baby "actually" is and that he'll come out some day but the bits and pieces he does understand are so cute.

[+] is ALL BOY and there's no doubt about it. He face-plants into the snow and laughs but screams bloody murder when we come inside and take off his coat. He points out every single trash can no matter where we are and is obsessed with the garbage truck on pick-up day. He throws balls like a champ, loves dinosaurs and runs everywhere. He gets the goofiest grin on his face when he farts and/or burps and has a mean side to him sometimes with pinching/hitting. He already has stinky boy feet and laughs when someone smells them.

xoxo, Momma

Baby H: 15 & 16 Months of Mark

I feel like J and I say this to each other almost on a daily basis but seriously, Mark is so stinking fun right now. He brightens our days, makes us laugh till our stomaches hurt and is getting so, so smart it's shocking sometimes. My favorite parts of the week are the evenings we spend together all on the floor in our family room as Mark runs absolutely wild in just his diaper after dinner and before bed.

He...

[+] is officially down to one nap which I personally love. It has given us so much more flexibility in our days... longer stretches of time in the morning to get things done, do fun things, etc... doesn't keep us stuck at home into the late afternoon if there's something going on in the evening. He did regress to two naps for about a week right around Christmas because he caught quite the cold and just couldn't sleep in longer stretches (and needed extra sleep too) but easily went back to one once he was feeling better.

[+] is exploding with language right now and IT. IS. AWESOME! He finally said "mom" for the first time on December 2nd and I must admit that I cried hearing it. It was seriously the sweetest sound I've ever heard. But really though, his language and communication is taking leaps and bounds lately and I'm so happy about it. His vocab now includes.... dad, mum, ollie, joooo (juice), wahh (water), hep (help), dow (down), up, ball, boo, rae (raisin), ree (read), ba (either banana, bath or book depending on the circumstance), hi & bye, eeee (eat, which he also signs for), pop (popcorn), pees (please) and probably more that I'm forgetting. He also knows animal sounds for dog, sheep and cow and will pick those animals out of books/on signs/etc etc.

[+] got his first haircut on December 12th and instantly went from big baby to little boy! We still kept a lot of the length on top because the bit of wave in his hair is just too cute to get rid of but he now has a straight hairline in the back and even tiny sideburns. He sat so well in the race-car chair and got all wide-eyed when she turned on the clippers but did great through the whole thing. I'm curious to see how quick his locks grow back but the jury's still out.

[+] should hopefully be done teething for a little while now that all the ones that were seemingly stuck have finally come through. He officially has four top teeth, four bottom teeth (hallelujah!) and four molars. He's started grinding said-teeth which I hate but I'll take it over the drooling, crabby teething mess any day.

[+] celebrated his second Christmas and made the holiday season that much more magical. He was actually interested in opening presents this year, his favorite being pulling tissue paper from gift bags, but wasn't quite sure what to think about the gifts inside every time. He willingly pulled all the tiny gifts from his stocking and put down some serious BBQ at Christmas dinner which are both essential Christmas tasks! Ha! I can't wait till next year when he'll hopefully have a better idea of what's going on and we'll get to start incorporating Santa and other traditions with our big boy.

[+] woke up on Christmas morning with what's been his worst cold of his life. Thankfully he hasn't really been sick much since he was born so we've almost been spoiled in a sense. I picked him up out of his crib and instantly heard the wheezing and saw his fountain of a nose and knew something was up. His congestion and cough were definitely the worst parts making it hard for him to sleep and eat and putting him just in a crabby mood overall. As much as I would have liked to do more "fun" things with him while I was on break from school, I was definitely glad I was home with him to snuggle him while he slept and help him feel better.

[+] started his first round of swim lessons right after the new year and is having so much fun at them. We're in a parent-tot, 30 min class every Saturday for the months of January and February at the local rec center and I can't wait to see how he progresses in the water. Being pregnant I'm loving getting in the pool with him and he's always loved the water so it was perfect timing before the summer arrives.

[+] is working on developing his fine motor skills. He has an empty water bottle that is filled with straw pieces for him to shake out and then carefully put back in. It's seeming like we might have a lefty on our hands since he definitely prefers to use his left hand and will even switch from the right to left if he's trying really hard. He's also working on using a spoon and a fork and so far it's slow progress but mostly because of us, not him. He does great when we load something for him (yogurt on the spoon, a piece of hotdog on the fork, etc etc) but we don't venture often into letting him do it all on his own just because we know it will be so so messy. But we have to let him practice I know.

[+] has learned to "jump" and it's absolutely hilarious. He squats really low and then shoots up and shouts. Sometimes he gets up on both his tippie-toes, sometimes he brings one foot entirely off the ground. He also dances when there's a good song on and sometimes will sway back and forth making the silliest "woooop, woooop, woooop" noise.

[+] has already mastered the toddler-tantrum. They're seriously the worst. He's normally so used to getting his way that when he doesn't you better watch out. Whether it's taking a toy (or non-toy) away from him, removing him from somewhere dangerous, making him sit in a highchair, etc etc etc he will literally scream bloody murder and have streaming tears even though nothing is ACTUALLY wrong.

We sure are lucky to call his boy ours!

Baby H: 13 & 14 Months of Mark

One things for sure, this little boy of ours is basically our favorite human ever! He's so wild and independent and confident. He is full of spunk, can be so much fun and truly is a boys boy. It's been so awesome to watch him pick up on new things the last few months and I can't wait to see who this little boy will be.

He... 

[+] still sleeps 7:30-7:30 in general but with the holidays and him getting older we aren't always so strict about his bedtime. We try to make sure it's close but it's also nice to have the flexibility to stay out a bit later if something fun is going on. We're starting to transition him to just one nap which is a slow process but it's getting there. We try to keep him up longer in the morning (previously he was napping around 10 and we've gotten consistently till 10:45/11) and are letting him sleep as long as he wants for the morning, usually between 1hr45min-2hr30min. He's taking what's turning into a cat nap in the afternoon between 3:30/4 to help bridge the gap between his morning and bedtime. Ideally I'd like to get to noonish, sleep till 2 or 3 and then be up for the day but any progress is good right now.

[+] will go and find a handful of object by name now and it's awesome. He knows "ball" and will get whichever is in closest proximity. He knows J's childhood stuffed dog Tuffy and lovingly grabs him by the ear to drag him around. He knows "your lady" which is the blonde girl from his Little People garage and most of the time he grabs her car to go with. He also knows balloon, paci, the banana piece to his puzzle, Blue Bear and Reindeer (his other stuffed animals).

[+] consistently signs "all done" and not just for eating... getting out of the bath, wanting to be put down, and the cutest is when you ask him if he wants to nap, like he's all done with the day, "eat" especially when he's whining in the kitchen and banging on the fridge doors, "milk" when he's done with foods and wants a drink, and "more please" when we're giving him snacks (please just got added recently and it's the cutest!).

[+] will touch his head, hair, tummy, diap (aka diaper) and occasionally ears when you ask.  He also just recently started lifting J and my shirts if you ask him "where's daddy's/momma's tummy?". He'll also point to his nose and makes the cutest sniffing sound. He sniffs his feet if you ask him "do you have stinky feet" and kicks them furiously when he's in the bath tub or sitting in his high chair.

[+] searches for Ollie when you say his name and will give him big hugs and "pat, pat, pats" if you ask him to. He also gives his stuffed animals giant hugs too.

[+] grabs his shoes and stands by the door if he wants to go outside. He also reaches for the doorknobs if you ask him if he wants to go outside. We've been working on saying "open" when he stands near the door and he tries so hard but mostly just says a "p" sound.

[+] learned to stomp his feet and spins in circles with his arms stretched out. He also kicks balls if you tell him too and he's actually really good at it. He picks up dog hair fluffs and takes them to the trash can in the kitchen.

[+] knows how to blow air and we've been working on associating blowing with things that are hot. He helps cool down his food on his plate before he eats it and if you hold him while there's something on the stove he's usually blowing in that direction too.

[+] still isn't very vocal in terms of specific words but with everything else above we know his communication skills are on-par so while I'd love for him to start "talking" more I'm also proud of everything he can do. He is however constantly babbling it just has no association most of the time. He still makes the "da" sound the most and I think he's starting to connect dada to J. He also tries to say water, juice, hat, and hot and has actually gotten pretty good at saying Ollie. He's still never once said mama which drives me crazy but we're working on it.

[+] has been in serious teething land lately and I don't see an end in sight anytime soon either. He had two bottom teeth and four top teeth going into his birthday and officially he now has a bottom L molar to add to the mix. His top L and bottom R molars are both poking through the tiniest bits and I'm starting to see his two bottom lateral teeth beneath his gums. I seriously don't know what's with this kid and his out-of-order teeth but it's pretty funny that he only has two bottom teeth but has one molar already!

[+] can seriously put down some food sometimes. He still loves all fruits, yogurt, cottage cheese and apple sauce. He loves eggs, sausage and pancakes for breakfast and dominates anything pasta with his favorite being tortellini. He'll basically eat any meat we give him which is awesome because I've heard a lot of little kids don't like it. He drinks milk, water and diluted juice from both a sippy cup and a straw cup. Strange enough he really isn't a sweets baby, turns away after one taste of whipped cream, spits out marshmallows, etc etc which is great but very odd too.

We love you Marky Mark!

Mark's Firsts: One Year Birthday

Mark's first birthday party was weeks ago and here I am blogging about it now. I wish I had a better excuse for the delay but frankly, I don't. And yet I wanted to be sure to document this special day. Our first born's first birthday! Because it sure was a magical day. Filled to the brim with love, pork sliders, sunshine, blue frosting and those we cherish most. 

It was a celebration of our first year as parents. A celebration of all Mark has learned and how much he's grown. A celebration of those people in our lives who helped us when we needed it, when we didn't think we needed it and just for the sake of being there for us. Mark has grown into such a wild, spunky, independent, free-spirited boy and we can't wait to see what the next year brings. And what better way to sum the last year than with a party!

Happy belated Birthday Mark!

A Letter to My 1st Born on His 1st Birthday

To my Marky-Mark on your first birthday,

We did it! One year down sweet boy.

This year has been one for the books and I am thankful each and every day that I am lucky enough to be your momma. It's been quite the year; the hardest and the sweetest, sleepless nights and plenty of tears, gummy grins and belly laughs. But one thing is for sure, it's been one of the best years of our lives. We've watched you strive and grow into a wild, independent, silly, boys-boy and I'm sure you've taught us far more than we've taught you.

You needed us fiercely in those first few days, weeks and months and taught us how priorities change in the best of ways when a baby enters your life.

You learned how good freedom tasted through crawling then walking then running and we learned to let you fly and always stand behind you incase you need us.

You've become feisty, always pushing your limits, but growing into such a brave soul and we've had to watch and accept how quickly the transformation from baby to boy really does happen right under our noses.

You sometimes cry for no reason, throw fits we can't control and push our buttons in ways we couldn't imagine before but you're teaching us the virtues of patience and forgiveness and grace and making us the best parents and people we can be.

You picked up eskimo kisses, flashing us your best smiles and waving with all your might and we fall even more in love with you, astonished at how much our hearts grow for you.

So today on your very first birthday I hope you feel our love for you. I hope you know how special you are. I hope today is exactly what you want it to be even though you likely won't remember the celebration. But boy oh boy is today a celebration. A celebration of you, my son, and the amazing first year we've shared together. Today you become a boy but in my heart you'll always be my baby.

I love each and every part of you, Mark, and cherish you more than you will ever know.
Happy Birthday my boy!

xoxo, Momma

Mark Eats: Sweet Potato Waffles

We are so thankful that Mark is a good eater (at least for now) and are always trying to come up with meals for him that incorporate yummy and healthy ingredients. A lot of the time he eats what we eat which makes things super easy... deconstructing shrimp alfredo into noodles, meat and broccoli, shredding chicken and adding a fruit, breaking up a burger patty with pieces of bun and sweet potato wedges.

But sometimes it comes in handy to have a few quick ideas stashed away for when we need them. My ideal meal for him is obviously something he'll actually eat and we won't have to force feed him, something that has good ingredients with little sugar and something that's quick to prepare at a moments notice. And these waffles hit all the must-haves!

1 1/2 c whole wheat flour

1 c oats

3 t baking powder

1 t cinnamon

1/4 t salt

2 eggs

1 c whole milk

1/2 c plain whole fat greek yogurt

3 T coconut oil

4 oz sweet potato puree (can use any type of puree on hand. apple, pumpkin, peach, etc)

2 T brown sugar

1. Combine all dry ingredients in a large bowl. 

2. Slowly beat in wet ingredients with puree being last. Combine until well mixed. 

3. Heat waffle maker and grease lightly. Use an ice-cream scoop or measuring cup to divide batter. 

4. Cook according to waffle maker instructions. 

5. Serve immediately or place cooled waffles in a ziplock in the freezer for easy access later. 

6. To re-heat, pop into toaster to warm and crisp. 

Mark's Firsts: Baptism

This past weekend our little boy was baptized and what a special day it was. Our immediate families and Mark's God-parents helped celebrate the day with us and everyone in the congregation just thought he was the most dapper little boy with his bow tie and Sperry's. There was a bit of stranger-danger going on for the actual baptism along with confusion as to why he was getting wet by a strange lady but thankfully the paci muffled his whines. He was an angel baby in the church up until the end when the service was cutting into nap time which only took a few minutes to reconcile in the lobby with some bouncing. 

We followed up the service with a quick nap in the carseat and a delicious brunch in downtown Littleton. The food was phenomenal, I devoured my peppered bacon eggs benny in a flash and we got to spend some good quality time with our families before heading our separate ways. While the day off from studying may or may not have influenced my exam score from yesterday (oops!), we had such a great day of celebration that it was definitely worth it!

Happy Baptism day baby boy! We love you.

Mark's Firsts: Eats

Every once in a while I have a "don't grow up baby" moment about time passing too quickly but my overall feeling is one of excitement and joy and wonder as we watch our little baby turn into a tiny boy. And as we've entered into the food realm those feelings have heightened. We've had a very positive experience so far and I wanted to share. 

For now I've been making all of Mark's foods and I plan to keep with it for as long as I can. Like anyone that makes baby food at home I do it for the lack of "extra" ingredients, I do it so I know exactly what's going in his little mouth, I do it because it's fun. Here's what's been on the menu.

peas + nutmeg   //   gala apples + cinnamon   //   butternut squash + thyme

blueberries + sweet potato + cinnamon   //   carrots + nutmeg

sweet potato   //   green beans + parsley   //   peaches + cloves

(not pictured are bananas and avocado that we mash up right before he eats)

We started with mashed banana and skipped right past all the rice cereal business. It was really easy to smash up banana with a little breast milk and we figured it'd be nice and sweet for him. His most recent food was avocado and like the bananas we also just smashed them up. When I'm actually making foods I cook a few batches in an afternoon (usually requiring steaming or roasting), blend them smooth (in either the magic bullet, blender or food processor) and pour the purees into ice cube trays to freeze overnight. Once they're completely set I pop them into freezer ziplock bags labeled and dated. When we serve him solids I grab a cube from the freezer, put it in a tiny glass tupperware bowl and heat it just slightly in the microwave to melt it and make it not too chilled.

Our method for food introduction has been alternating fruits and vegetables. Which is always comical when we go from, say, apples (sweet & tasty!!!) to something like squash (also tasty but a very different flavor). It catches him by surprise every once in a while. We started feeding him just once a day in the afternoon to make sure if he was going to have a reaction to something we'd catch it before he went down for bed and now have moved to twice a day. When we introduce something new he gets solely that one item for the next three days to also check for negative reactions. So far we've only had a bit of diaper rash that I believe was due to the carrots but everything else has been golden. Since his nutrition is still coming solely from milk/formula we aren't concerned about how much he's eating but just for reference we give him one cube which equates to one ounce twice a day. Maybe twice has he not finished the bowl and once we offered him two and he gobbled them up.

Now that we've made it through so many different flavors and he's getting the hang of it we're going to start mixing things up. A different food at dinner compared to lunch, making new combos (up next on the list is an apple/spinach/pea combo) as well as starting into a bit of baby lead weaning. While he hasn't totally enjoyed everything we've given him (i.e. carrots and green beans weren't a huge hit) he's definitely enjoying the process and so are we. 

Breastfeeding Chronicles

I am just going to put it out there right off that bat that breastfeeding is hard. Seriously, hard. I've said it before and I'll say it again, for something that's supposed to be so natural it's crazy to me that it has to be so tough. Here's my story...

*warning, this post talks about boobs, breast milk, nipples and the like. 

if you aren't a momma or aren't interested in being one, this post will have nothing but weird details for you. 

along with pictures of Mark nursing without any goods showing. you've been warned*

When Mark was first born he impressed many nurses by latching on fantastically just a few minutes after he was born. He seemed like he really had the hang of it and we thought we were on the right page while in the hospital that first day. At one point he was cluster feeding like a madman and our longest stretch was over 90 minutes, switching between sides every 15 minutes. Insanity I tell you. But it didn't stop there. The nurses took him to the nursery shortly after this feed to do his bili scan and regular testing and when they brought him back to the room they said he had low blood sugars which was alarming since he had just eaten for over an hour. They asked if we were okay supplementing to which we responded yes and started to worry. While in the hospital I was hooked up to a pump a few times as well as nursing on demand to try and get the milk flowing!

Once we were home my milk still wasn't in and I attribute that fact to why those first few days were so hard. I get it, everyone is cranky and unhappy when they're hungry and my little boy was no exception. I spent my entire existence focused on making milk. J made me lactation cookies, I would pump after every feeding, Mark ate every 2-3 hours. It was exhausting. When it did finally come in, about day 4, things seemed better again.

And then around week 4 I was at my wits end. Mark's latch was no longer fantastic like it was in those early days, I was cracked and sore because of it and even had one side that would bleed and scab. Nursing him starting giving me high anxiety and would literally make me cry when he first latched and drank because of the pain. At one point I thought we might be dealing with thrush because his tongue seemed white and I had lasting, deep breast pain even when not feeding. After a trip to the pediatrician and OBGYN it was confirmed that we didn't have a yeast problem which was that much more frustrating, to not have answers still. I ended up having to go on a 72-hour nursing strike where I only pumped because it hurt less and we gave Mark my milk from a bottle in attempts to help my poor milk machines heal.

But I knew overall that something needed to be different so we finally called a lactation consultant to come to our house to help us. She was fantastic with latch, helped me learn to use a nipple shield, recommended a great product for me to put on between feeds and things started getting better, again. It turned out the deep pains I was having were nerve pains due to compression while Mark nursed and gradually they went away. I started healing and eventually we weened from the shield.

Mark has never been a big baby and like any first time mom I was always worried that he wasn't getting enough from me. But he would feed every three hours, tell me when he was hungry and when he was finished nursing and our doctor didn't seem concerned. He hovered around the 15th percentile for weight which was just fine for our little guy. Around 2 months his nursing habits seemed to drastically change. He went from nursing 10-15 minutes per side to 10-15 minutes total and seemed pretty unhappy about it too. We attributed the change in duration to him being more efficient and contemplated reflux issues making him unhappy and kept trucking along. When his next doctor's appointment only showed him around the 8th percentile is when we started being a bit more concerned. We did weighted feeds with him, measuring him before a feed and then right after to see how much he was transferring from me and were consistently only getting between 2-3 oz. And with eating 7-8 times a day the math for the right volume just wasn't adding up. It was assumed that his fussiness was due to the lack of milk flow after he guzzled what I had for him but he refused to nurse longer to stimulate my body for more.

So from that point I was back to the early days of focusing on milk production. I started eating oatmeal every morning for breakfast and occasionally having a dark beer after dinner. I took supplements and drank tea that's supposed to help with supply. I made sure I was eating enough calories and drinking at least 100+ oz of water every day. I would pump after every time I nursed him and then pump till let-down every hour between feeds. When I had a spare hour (sarcasm noted) I would power pump too. All of this to no avail. In fact I almost feel like my supply continued to tank. And on top of it, Mark was getting more and more difficult to feed. Feeding him was the most stressful part of my day because it would literally take me 45 minutes to get him to eat for a total of 10 minutes and the rest of the time was spent screaming and crying (from both of us). I was mentally and physical exhausted from it all and my efforts weren't even making a difference. The anxiety and the stress and the guilt of it all was becoming too much to handle. I loved my baby boy too much to put us both through this for much longer.

Finally at his 4 month appointment, when his weight was down to the 5th percentile, we decided to make a change. I started nursing him only when he first woke up, for his dream feed when I was headed to bed and if/when he needed to eat during the night. The rest of the four feeds during the day we supplemented with formula while I continued to pump every three hours. I had wanted to nurse him for as long as possible but more realistically the goal was to get him out of flu season and to at least 6 months drinking as much breast milk as possible. So the milk that I was pumping during the day was going into the freezer because, according to our pediatrician, one single feeding of breast milk was all the immune benefit he needed. I wanted to get to a point where there was at least one bag of frozen milk for every day until he turned six months old.

And I did it! On average I would get about 10 oz each day pumping four times and he drinks 5 oz from a bottle at each feeding which meant two servings in the freezer. Once we had all those bags packed packed away I've continued to pump. Now instead of reserving it all for later use, once I get up to 10oz, 5 goes into a bottle for him that day and 5 goes into the freezer. On average he's only getting 10oz of formula a day now which is fantastic in my eyes given the struggle that it's been.

My plan as of right now is to continue to pump as long as I can to keep the supply coming but the weight that has been lifted can't even be put into words. Mark is gaining weight like crazy now that he's likely getting double the volume each day compared to before and I can tell how much happier he is. I have so much less stress because I can enjoy feeding him now even if it is from a bottle instead of struggling with breastfeeding a boy who wouldn't nurse. Some days I feel very tied to my pump and some days it seems very doable. Some days I get to power pump twice in a day and am diligent about it while other days I'll miss a session because it's not convenient if we're out and about.

We've come a long way and it's been hard. I still battle a lot of emotions about our breastfeeding journey (which deserves a whole post in itself) and our journey isn't quite over just yet. I would have never wished this outcome on us in the beginning but I can confidently say that I'm happy. And Mark is happy. And isn't that all that really matters anyways?

Five on Friday v7

Today I'm linking up with Christina from Carolina Charm for "Five on Friday" 

Check out the link up below.

[one] We're expecting anywhere from 9 to 18 inches of snow between now and Monday which will make this weekend an adventure. Hopefully it's less than that because blizzards are never fun but it wouldn't be too bad to have a good excuse to say in for at least a little while. I'm thankful that this storm is happening on the weekend when we don't have anywhere we HAVE to be but it would be nice to have some fun this weekend too. Let's see what mother nature has up her sleeve I guess. 

[two] I may or may not chop my hair some time soon. Thanks to breastfeeding my hair is thinner and falling out in clumps and I'm thinking it's in need of a change. Not that I actually take the time to fix it that often but when I do it makes me sad that my pregnant, thick, awesome hair is no longer. The reason I haven't bit the bullet yet is because I'm not sure if a new style/shorter do will actually help anyways. 

[three] Last night we took Mark and Ollie on a walk and for the first time ever we didn't take the car seat! On a whim we wondered if he was big enough to just sit in the stroller and low-and-behold he was. So we bundled him up in his bear suit (that he's normally too hot-bodied to wear), strapped him in and he loved it. He's always been wide-eyed and curious so being able to see everything was a great thing for him. I can't wait to do it again.

[four] Wednesday I got the chance to have some girl time and it was much, much needed. My group of med school ladies and I went out for wine and apps at a little wine bar in town followed by an afternoon showing of 50 Shades. It definitely wasn't my type of movie but it was my type of activity. Good friends, tasty treats and a few hours of relaxation was exactly what I needed. We said we would try to do it more often and I sure hope that happens. 

[five] Mark is in the "everything goes in my mouth stage" and it's quite funny sometimes. He's been chewing on his fingers and toys for a little while but now it's absolutely everything. The list of things to chew now includes his feet when he's sitting up, book pages while we're reading before bed and phones when we're taking selfies. He's growing and changing in rapid speed lately and it's so much fun.

Thankful v14

Lately I've been thankful...

[+] for this little boy, simple as that

[+] for sleep training and better nights all around

[+] for a husband who's always on my team and is my biggest fan

 [+] for a new dance partner and my favorite Disney tunes on repeat

[+] for spring-like weather in February and the wardrobe I get to wear again

 [+] for baby bears and FaceTime 

[+] for growth, in every sense of the word

[+] for his silly little personality that's starting to blossom 

[+] for small moments of goodness and being home for milestones 

  [+] for baby chub, leg rolls and cheeks I could kiss all day

[+] for so much less anxiety and stress in regard to raising this sweet boy

I sure am blessed. 

What are you thankful for today?